I want to start off this morning by talking about gratitude and fear. I used to be real comfortable with saying things like "I am a creature of habit" and similar things that basically meant I ran on autopilot, never took risks, and was pretty militant with lists... I am still pretty big on my lists, I make one any day I am off work that maps out how I am gonna get it all done.
That being said, I did not realize how much I was limiting myself with that kind of thinking. Think about it.... "I am a creature of habit." What does that really say? It says that I am not up for anything that is not my everyday norm. It used to also instill fear in me when something did disrupt my 'routine'... Fear. Anxiety. All the things that if you focus on them, is basically like making them your mantra. Your prayer.
Well, towards the end of the summer last year, I opened up a bit. Broadened my horizons and allowed some new growth. Got okay with getting out of my comfort zone. Baby steps. It is how you grow after all, right? So I started by seeking out a new prospect for an acre out on the farm. I wanted to do something good for myself, the universe, and cultivating some good stuff on a chunk of land that had caused me so much anxiety for several months, seemed like a good place to start...
I have said it before, and I will say it again. Last year, I got totally consumed, obsessed, and fixated on things that were causing me major frustrations - and all those things physically bordered that acre of land that I decided to cultivate. Hard pill to swallow, but it worked. I found myself doing that ol' (eye-rolling, easier said than done)] cliche, I let go and let God. AND IT WORKED. Yep. I shifted my focus on helping out a friend, learning something new, and BOOM! all my troubles went away... Seriously.
I watched nervously as we broke ground last fall, and felt the change as we continued to cultivate the land and sow seeds of change. Yes... Crazy as it sounds, I could have done this waaaaaaay earlier and been at peace sooner, BUT I was meant to see the hard truth of how getting fixated on something negative can and will cause negative things to happen to you in return. I needed this 'in your face' blunt example. I always thought I was such an optimist - even preach about being positive - but I wasn't living by that... Now, after my slap in the face from reality, I am once again, reset, and awakened by the good energy that is brewing out here.
I spend most of the day sitting at a desk at my 9-5er, but when I get home, the last few weeks, I go out into the garden and pick... or weed.... and remember how this all happened.... because I STILL have the same surroundings as before, but my energy shifted, therefor I attract different energy for myself. It is wonderful, really! Even Christian has noticed the HUGE shift and change in how it feels out here at the farm. Life lessons. Even though I am one of those stubborn people that thinks I know it all, I am humbled when I get a clear wake up call and see how I was mucking up my own life...
This is one of the reasons I decided to do the #100HappyDays challenge again. I am pretty good at posting on IG - too good really - I post a LOT, and obviously I am posting things that I think are beautiful, or inspiring...but to actually think about how that one moment made me happy, and hashtagging it, just makes the focus on good energy a little bit more sustainable. It lasts longer - I am sure it is all mind game, but it is one I need. It helps keep me in check. I strongly encourage you to try this challenge if you have a struggle with staying positive - we can all fake it, but this challenge makes it harder to fake...
Here is the weekly roundup of my last week of #100HappyDays... Enjoy!
Yowza!! Happy Friday! Lots of farm fun planned for this weekend - Lots of gardening, mowing, a little painting, and a bit of sewing! Gonna dust off the machine and get going on some colorful curtains for the outbuilding made from vintage fabric!